I'm So Distracted: Why We Need to Find a Different Way to Live

I sat on the edge of my unmade bed, searching Pinterest for home ideas with half of my brain. The other half tried to decipher if the shouts and banging in the living room were worth getting up to check. Was that happy or argumentative shouting? Playful or destructive banging? It was hard to tell. Did I really want to know? If it was a relatively harmless argument, shouldn’t I let...

When You Stink at Unconditional Love

"I hate him. I just can't do it anymore." Heartbroken words were whispered as a tearful prayer to God in one of my darkest moments as a mom over two years ago. Of course I didn't mean it. I didn't hate my son. I don't hate my son. I love him and want so badly to see him succeed and for me to step out of the way and allow Christ to heal his wounded places without my offense at his...

I Didn't Actually Lose Myself

I've been thinking for some time about what I would share in honor of National Foster Care Month. But, well, that was back in May when I started writing this post. Foster Care Month or not, the words I share here are still true. When we believed God was calling us to adopt in 2009 after the last of our first four kids were born, we did not believe God was asking us to foster adopt. We prayed...

Time is a Teacher

Recently I sat down with my journal after getting the young ones to bed and looked back at my entries from our first couple of months living in North Carolina.  I don't write in this particular journal every day or even every week. I write in it when everything comes to a head and I just can't deal. I appropriately titled it my Things That Feel Too Hard journal. It's where I keep my...

If You Think Something Nice, Say It

I haven't been to an over-abundance of funerals in my life, but I've been to enough to notice a few things. Each time I'm at a memorial service, as kind words are bravely spoken from the pulpit by loved ones, I always have one great hope as I manage the lump in my throat: I hope this person heard these words before they passed. I pray they knew how beloved they were. I picture the person...

What 2016 Taught

Every once in a while, I like to stop and recount what I've learned after a long stretch of life, and the start of 2017 seemed like the perfect time to pause and look back. Here are my major takeaways from 2016. 1.  I don't always know the answers. My gut isn't always right.  As hard as it is to swallow, 2016 showed me that my pride and assumptive abilities have no place in any area...

I Pledge Allegiance to Their Standards (No Thanks)

The bath water was warm and inviting. A cup of chai tea sat on the edge of the tub. I wondered if I'd even drink it. Hot water on the outside of the body paired with more hot water poured into the inside is sometimes too much. The door was locked and my laptop sat sturdy atop the hamper. A show would be nice. Time alone would be nicer. Children aged nine and under were tucked in bed at the...

Seven Weeks Later

I picked up my journal this morning for the first time in three months. Three months ago we were one month away from closing on our home and moving in with my in-laws and then my parents' until we left the state at the start of August.  Since then, time has both stood still and zoomed by at warp speed. Jeremy has been watching Star Trek Generations re-runs at night, so you'll forgive...

The Olympic Hopeful and the Christian

Well, we did it. We loosened our grip on our beloved Alaska and reached across the continent to embrace a brand new place to call home. We arrived in North Carolina one week ago, and I'm happy to report we're all in one piece and enjoying the vacation-like setting we're in right now before the realities of life including school, work, and moving into our home set in. I'm documenting over on Instagram...

On Moving and Leaping

It's taken me two whole months to actually sit down and write about our family's move 4,000 miles from home here in Alaska. Partly because I've been terribly busy organizing our move, getting our home ready, selling things off, packing, and then just living life as a wife, mom, and friend, and partly because I haven't known what to say or how to explain it. But it's actually really simple...

Meet My Brain {9 Notebooks That Save My Life}

When other women ask how I "do it all" (whatever that means), I usually shrug my shoulders and talk about what a good team Jeremy and I are. Which is completely true. Never once have I stopped to consider there are additional ways I intentionally calm the crazy in my life. Enter my notebooks. I'll put myself out there and say that I feel all warm and fuzzy about my notebook collection. I usually...

We Need You and Want You {Mentor Us, Please}

About a year and a half ago I stood in my bathroom and cried hot tears I didn't know were lying dormant inside of me. I was grieving.  I realized my life had a gaping hole in it and I'd only just figured out what it was.  I was mentor-less.  Thirteen years ago, I moved back to the community I grew up in with my husband of three years, and two teeny little boys. I'd had...

3 Questions to Ask Ourselves About Friendship

Friendships with other women can be absolutely beautiful. But as we all know, they can be tricky little specimens too. In my younger adult years, I used to slather myself across a wide expanse of friendships. It's in my extroverted nature to go deep and fast with new friends I believe can be trusted, so this habit has helped me make lots of friends through the years. It's a great trait until...

So You're Mad at Your Real Life

Let's just say Monday was not my favorite day ever. It got so bad, that we packed a quick lunch and bolted out the door to who knows where, skipping naps and everything. I could not stay home amidst the frustrating attitudes and actions displayed by a couple of the kids. I was also upset at myself for not handling it better.  We did absolutely nothing except drive around, take in some...